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Eharmony's Dating Advice supports you with helpful tips for topics like finding yourself, dating, attraction and committing to a relationship. Jun 28, 2021 eHarmony is the largest dating site geared specifically towards long-term relationships and marriage minded singles. They claim to be responsible for over 500 new marriages every day in the US.

What you’ll learn on this page:

• eHarmony Review: Why eHarmony is better than Match & okCupid
• Learn how to message women on eHarmony & have a date by this weekend.
• Downloadable Templates that improve responses by 800%
• See clear examples.
• The latest eHarmony discount promo code – 2015

eHarmony is perfectly suited for Men of any age who:

► Are Getting back into the dating scene after a long relationship
► Or want to start dating more attractive women
► Live in the either the United States, Canada, United Kingdom or Australia

eHarmony vs Match: Fight!

eHarmony did not start out as my favorite dating site.

But I’m in the middle of my 150 Date Challenge now and more than half of all my dates come from eHarmony and I’ve grown to really like it.

Don’t get me wrong, both Match & okcupid are good and I use both but the results I’ve been getting on eHarmony are better and many eDatingDoc Academy students are having the same experience.

HOWEVER, if you don’t use the site properly, you’ll get crappy results.

Ahhhh, but have no fear.

Below, I’ve compiled all of my eHarmony specific secrets & best practices for you to use. The devil is in the details so be sure to pay close attention.

eHarmony Review: Why is eHarmony so good?

1. Quality of Women
2. Lack of Competition

I skeptically joined eHarmony thinking it wouldn’t be very good. I read over & over again that eHarmony was a waste of time from several different PUA’s (that’s pick-up artists) This consistent low view of eHarmony in the PUA community is exactly what I think has made it so good. The douche PUA guys don’t recommend it, so the PUA minions don’t flock to it, so there is less competition and the guys that do join are just regular guys (not PUA’s) that lack online dating training. So when my academy students join they dominate the website and easily meet the women they are most interested in. On top of that the women only receive a small number of matches per day so they literally can’t be bombarded by messages like they are on other dating sites.

Ok, Let’s get started with the eHarmony specific details:

Lesson #1: Making first contact:
eHarmony Email Tips

There are a few ways to make contact on eHarmony but you’ll only use two of them.

1. Quick Questions (This begins the guided communication)
2. eH Mail (This skips the guided communication)
3. Send a smile (Never use this)
4. Secure Call (Never use this)

1. When to use the eHarmony guided communication quick questions:

Start with the quick questions if the girl is somewhat close to your “league”.

2. When to skip & go straight to eH Mail:

Go straight to eH Mail contact option if she is a way outside of your “league” or you are REALLY interested in her.

Note:
You know, how we give women a number, like “WHOAH!She’s a solid 10 baby!” In person, you may be a 8 or 9 but if you haven’t been through the eDatingDoc Academy then your “online number” is probably much lower. A good sign is if you are not getting responses from the women that you know would like you in person. If this is happening to you, there is a 100% chance you are doing something wrong so check this out after reading this guide.

How to use the Quick Questions with Examples

After you send your quick-questions, she’ll respond and ask you 5 quick questions in return.

You could select the multiple choice answers like most guys do.

And you could pack your bags and call it a day.

Because that’s why most guys fail – doing what every other guy does…

Here’s what to do instead. (This is powerful so don’t disregard it)

ALWAYS CHOOSE“Write your own response” (examples below)

This works SO well yet is so simple.

Always write out awesome responses.

I know, I know

This would take a ton of time if you have to write out a great response every time but you only need to write an awesome response once.

Then save it to a word document so you can cut & paste that answer when the question is asked again by another girl, and it will be asked again.

And to make it even easier for you.

I created that word document for you. Here is The eDatingDoc Quick-Response Blueprint for eHarmony with the top questions women ask and example answers.

You can use the examples as a guide but definitely add responses that are authentic, true to your life & personality. Here are the examples in the download.

eHarmony Quick Questions & Answer Examples

If you were taken by your date to a party where you knew no one, how would you respond?
►Start twerking and wait for the ladies to crowd around, oh yeah! (or not)

On Saturday night, would you rather go to:
►I like to change it up but I’m going Downtown for the Big Brothers Big Sisters charity event with some friends this Saturday. (It’s a great cause – do good while having fun!)

Would you rather date someone who is:
►So damn amazing that every time you walk away I make a fist, reach up in the sky and say LORD help me! Then lean over to whoever is around and say, “Yup – I’m dating her”.

Which sort of date sounds like the most fun to you?
►A comedy club sounds like a good idea. You know what makes the comedians even funnier?

When in a relationship, how much personal space do you generally find you need?
►I think personal space and having one’s own time is important to making any relationship work.

If I had a bad day, what is the first thing you would do for me?
►I’d say awww baby, give you a big hug and kisses then do the sexy man shuffle in my speedos (Surprise!)

Your idea of a romantic time would be:
►A wine and Vosges chocolate picnic at the park in the evening.

Your idea of adventure is:
►Finding a hidden pirate ship in a cave 🙂

Which of the following quirks would bother you most about your partner?
►Squeezing the toothpaste from the middle so it looks like it was attacked by a monkey.
[/fu]

Remember to be balanced!

As you can see, some of my answers are playful while others are straight forward. I can’t emphasize this enough! If you’re too playful your results will tank because she’ll think you’re childish. If you’re too serious, you’re results will tank because she’ll think you take life too seriously and can’t have fun!

Advanced Tip:
Have a conversation within the quick-question response area to build more of a connection.

Here’s an example of what I mean:

Her interesting response to one of the quick-questions:

So when she sends me her quick questions, I made one response into a mini conversation by mentioning what she just wrote.

This builds more of a connection and makes the guided communication process even more interesting.

Making you the Most Interesting Man in the World… well at least on eHarmony.

Lesson #2: – eHarmony Makes or Breaks

The next step in the guided communication is the Makes or Breaks.

Not a big deal right?

el Wrong-o!

Pay attention because these can communicate a lot about you.

Especially the Breaks.

For example, I’ve seen guys select these breaks:

Eharmony Commercial Girls

What does this communicate to the girl?

That you’ve probably been cheated on, you have trust issues because you were cheated on, there was probably a reason you were cheated on and she doesn’t want to waste her time finding out why you were cheated on….

The best breaks to select are centered around the type of person she is internally not how she is with others.

There are a few exceptions.

Lesson #3: – eHarmony Dig Deeper Questions

This is the final step of the guided communication before you make it to eH mail.

You must type out your response to these questions.

Time to shine.

Most guys reply with boring answers at every step that scream “I’m lazy and I’m boring!”

But you?

Hell to the NO!

Your answers will sometimes be silly… sometimes be intelligent and informative but never DULL & LAZY.

And just like the quick questions, save your responses (to the eDatingDoc eHarmony Quick-Response Blueprint) so you can just cut & paste that answer when the same question is asked again by another girl. And like I said before, it will be asked again.

To make that easier & clearer, I listed the top Dig Deeper questions women ask and included example answers to each of these.

If you didn’t download it earlier, click here to get it..

eHarmony Dig Deeper Questions & eHarmony Response Examples

Tonight you can do anything you want, no penalties, no reprisals, and the cost is unimportant. What are you going to do?
►Run around and knock a bunch of shit off all the shelves at Walmart while it’s really busy and yell “Whoaaaaaaa Yeaaahhhhhhhh.”

What do you think are the three best traits you have to offer a partner?
►A sexy sexy beast, laid back & logical. An example of my superior logic: Mom says, “Alcohol is your enemy.” Jesus says, “Love your enemy.” Case closed.

What is the most adventures thing you’ve done in the past year?
►I drove across Europe for 2 months checking out 11 countries. Awesome experience! Had a beer at the same bar the character Robin Hood was based on drank at in the year 1100. Pretty cool.

What are you looking for in a relationship partner?
►You have depth and a good heart, You don’t get your happiness through material possessions, not to get too mushy but someone that’s affectionate, you’re balanced so enjoy nights out.

They say life is about simple pleasures, what is your simplest pleasure, and how does it make you feel?
►Playing basketball with friends – It’s this physical thing to push myself until I’m destroyed and I sleep like a baby and wake up rejuvenated. That and perfect Apple Pie.

What is the best thing an ex could say about you?
►That I changed her life for the better.

If they were making a movie about your life, what would it be called and which actor would play you?
►It would be called “I’ve never done that – Let’s do it!” of course it would be played by Brad Pitt.

Describe your parents’ relationship with each other.
►They have an amazing relationship: My mom recently convinced my Dad to change the horn on the car so it makes gunshot sounds. People move out of the way much faster now.[/fu]

Lesson #4: – eHarmony Mail

I’m throwing in a secret right now for the guys that were not lazy and actually read this far.

I call this step “Squash the Slackers”

I recommend combining the previous step with this step every single time.

So instead of sending the girl your 3 Dig Deeper questions within the normal eHarmony process. You instead skip to the eHarmony mail and send those same questions. (Example email below)

Women are very interested in your answers to their 3 questions. So you’re still answering them but you’re making it more interesting and doing something no other guy is doing. You’re also shortening the long process and making that first email come very easily. Now you don’t have to wonder how to start the conversation. This email does it for you.

Here is the sample eHarmony email to send when you skip this step:

Now you need to send the next few emails & get her phone number. This is where my 3×5 email system comes in. See item #2 in the quick-action homework below.

Your Quick-Action Homework for a great date
in less than 7 days on eHarmony:

1. Sign-up to eHarmony – Here is the special registration page where you can try it for free. If you use this guide you will want to continue the membership so use this (2015 Discount Promo Code : EHCODE12)
2. Follow this guide you just read when contacting the women you’re interested in & you’ll have a date with an amazing girl this week.

Eharmony Hottest Girls

Eharmony (styled eHarmony) is an online dating website launched in 2000. eHarmony is based in Los Angeles, California, and owned by German mass media company ProSiebenSat.1 Media.^[1]

History[edit]

eHarmony was founded by Neil Clark Warren, a clinical psychologist, with his son-in-law, Greg Forgatch.^[2] Warren and Forgatch created Neil Clark Warren & Associates, a seminar company, in 1995.^[2] The company eventually became the dating website eHarmony.^[2] During its initial four years, the website was developed by TechEmpower.^[3]

The service was financed with a $3 million investment from Fayez Sarofim & Co. and individual investors.^[4] eHarmony was launched in 2000, making it the first algorithm-based dating site.^[4][5] Between 2000 and 2010, about 33 million members used the service.^[6] As of 2008, about 15,000 people were taking the eHarmony questionnaire each day.^[7]Harris Interactive said in 2010 that after finding a match on eHarmony, an average of 542 eHarmony members in the United States marry every day.^[8]

eHarmony has been profitable since 2004.^[9] In 2009, eHarmony's cumulative revenue exceeded $1.0 billion while their annual revenue was about $250 million.^[10][9] As of 2012, eHarmony had 14 percent of the U.S. dating-services market.^[11]

Eharmony Girl In Commercial

During 2009–12, new memberships, retention rates and time spent on the site decreased. In July 2012, Neil Clark Warren came out of retirement to become chief executive officer. Warren closed unprofitable international operations, switched advertisers, made changes to the board,^[12] and bought back stock from Sequoia Capital and Technology Crossover Ventures.^[11] eHarmony featured in the 2013 film The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, where the namesake protagonist speaks to a personal counselor at the company.^[13] In 2017, it was reported that eHarmony had about 750,000 paid subscribers and 10 million active users, which was about the same as it had been in 2012.^[14] Warren left the company again in July 2016.^[2]

In 2016, eHarmony announced their questionnaire would now be optional for users.^[15] By 2017, the questionnaire consisted of 150 questions, down from 450 questions.^[16]

In 2018, German mass media company ProSiebenSat.1 Media purchased eHarmony via their Nucom ecommerce division (a joint venture of ProSiebenSat and private equity firm General Atlantic).^[1]

Methodology[edit]

Prospective members complete a proprietary questionnaire about their characteristics, beliefs, values, emotional health and skills. Matching algorithms, which the company believes match people's core traits and values to replicate the traits of happy couples, use these answers to match members with users the company believes will be compatible.^[17] The software technology also evaluates users' behavioral data such as average time spent on the site.^[18]

Buckwalter says that the compatibility system rests a lot on commonality, for their belief is that 'Opposites attract, then they attack.'^[19]

Starting in January 2017, eHarmony users could see why they are considered compatible with a feature called 'The Two Of You Together'. They will be able to see the matches who score at an advanced level of compatibility and also why.^[20]

Reception and analysis[edit]

Applicant rejection[edit]

It is estimated that about 20% of eHarmony applicants are rejected.^[21] In 2007, eHarmony stated since the site's launch, they had rejected about a million people who applied to use the service. They reported that about 30% of those applicants were denied because they were already married, 27% were younger than the minimum application age of 21, and 9% provided inconsistent answers on the application. eHarmony also stated they reject anyone under the age of 60 who has been married more than four times, or who fails their 'dysthymia scale', testing as having a depressed disposition.^[22]

Same-sex couples[edit]

When it began, eHarmony did not offer same-sex matches; it now offers them through a separate service, Compatible Partners.^[23] Warren said that he had done extensive research on heterosexual marriage but did not know enough about homosexual relationships to do same-sex match-making, which he said 'calls for some very careful thinking. Very careful research.'^[23] He also said that eHarmony promotes heterosexual marriage, adding that (at the time) same-sex marriage was illegal in most places, saying 'We don't really want to participate in something that's illegal.'^[23] In another interview, Warren went into more detail on his own views, noting that 'cities like San Francisco, Chicago or New York... they could shut [eHarmony] down so fast. We don't want to make enemies out of them. But at the same time, I take a real strong stand against same-sex marriage, anywhere that I can comment on it.'^[24]

eHarmony's lack of same-sex matching options prompted lawsuits claiming that eHarmony violated laws prohibiting discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation.^[25] As part of the settlement of a New Jersey case,^[26]eHarmony launched a partner website called Compatible Partners providing match-making 'for men and women looking for a serious same-sex relationship'.^[27][28]Theodore B. Olson, an attorney for eHarmony, said that even though the company believed the complaint was 'an unfair characterization of our business', it chose to settle because of the unpredictable nature of litigation.^[29] In 2010, eHarmony settled a separate class-action lawsuit filed in California that alleged illegal discrimination based on sexual orientation. The company, which did not admit wrongdoing, agreed to allow access to both its gay and straight dating sites with a single subscription, to display its gay dating services more prominently and to establish a settlement fund to pay people who can show they were harmed by the company's policies.^[30][31]

As of 2013, about 200,000 people had registered with Compatible Partners.^[32] Michelle Garcia, writing in the LGBT-interest magazine, The Advocate, also said that, like eHarmony, Compatible Partners attracts high-quality customers. According to Garcia, 'Because of the price tag and the emphasis on long-term relationships... Compatible Partners' users are seen as quite desirable.'^[32]

Matching paying members with non-paying members[edit]

After approval by the questionnaire, eHarmony begins to match members regardless of their subscription status. A member's list of matches does not indicate which members are paying or non-paying, so users may not be able to communicate with all of their matches.^[33]

Security breach[edit]

On June 6, 2012, eHarmony confirmed that its password database had been breached and a section of its user base had been affected.^[34][35] Affected members were sent e-mails by the company requesting them to change their password immediately.^[36]

Eharmony Member Log In

Explaining success[edit]

Eharmony Girls Nc

A 2010 article published by the Harvard Business Review attributed the success of eHarmony's system to their large membership base, their efforts to exclude people who are not serious about dating, and their membership fees being more expensive than the fees for other dating websites. The author hypothesizes that, since eHarmony's questionnaire and high cost of membership deter people who are interested in casual dating, eHarmony's members are more likely to be interested in a long-term relationship.^[37]

Criticism over claims[edit]

A 2012 analysis of dating websites by Scientific American stated that eHarmony, along with other algorithm-based dating sites, had not yet provided members of the scientific community with information about their matching algorithm which could be used to vet their claims about their algorithms being scientifically-based.^[5]

In 2014, eHarmony was criticized by the National Advertising Division of the Better Business Bureau over claims the company had made about their rates of success. This occurred after Match.com challenged claims made by eHarmony about the two companies' relative success.^[38]

In 2018, the Advertising Standards Authority stated that an eHarmony ad which included the lines, 'It's time science had a go at love,' and 'Imagine being able to stack the odds of finding lasting love entirely in your favor,' was misleading. When the ASA asked for evidence supporting eHarmony's claims that their scientifically proven matching system increases the odds of finding love, eHarmony was not able to provide any.^[39] The ASA subsequently banned advertisements that claimed the use of a scientifically proven matching system. eHarmony publicly disagreed with the ASA but said it would work with them to clarify its advertising.^[40]

See also[edit]

References[edit]

1. ^ ^ab'Germany's ProSieben buys U.S. online dating site eharmony'. Reuters Business News. 2018-10-29. Retrieved 2019-04-29.
2. ^ ^abcdUtermohlen, Karl (26 July 2016). 'eHarmony Founder Neil Clark Warren Steps Down as CEO'. InvestorPlace. Retrieved 3 January 2018.
3. ^'TechEmpower'. www.techempower.com. Retrieved 2020-06-01.
4. ^ ^ab'History of eHarmony'. Online Dating Magazine. 2008-09-16.
5. ^ ^abEli J. Finkel, Susan Sprecher (8 May 2012). 'The Scientific Flaws of Online Dating Sites'. Scientific American. Scientific American. Retrieved 8 January 2018.
6. ^'Dating Site Marks 10 Years With Ad Campaign'. The New York Times. Retrieved 2013-11-01.
7. ^Kirkpatrick, David (2007-09-14). 'eHarmony does what tech ought to do'. CNN. Retrieved 2010-04-03.
8. ^'eHarmony Celebrates 10 Years of Online Relationships Fox Business Video'. Video.foxbusiness.com. 2010-08-30. Retrieved 2013-11-01.
9. ^ ^abClark, Andrew (24 August 2010). 'Dating site eHarmony aims to dominate British market'. The Guardian. Retrieved 5 January 2018.
10. ^Geron, Tomio (2010-07-12). 'The $100M Revenue Club: EHarmony Captures the Hearts of VCs'. The Wall Street Journal's Venture Capital Dispatch.
11. ^ ^ab'eHarmony founder breaks up with investors in company reboot'. Delawareonline.com. Archived from the original on 2013-11-04. Retrieved 2013-11-01.
12. ^'EHarmony founder has his heart set on reviving the dating site'. Los Angeles Times. 2012-12-13. Retrieved 2013-11-01.
13. ^'EHarmony Launches Service Modeled After 'Walter Mitty' Plotline'. The Hollywood Reporter. 12/11/2013. Retrieved 21 March 2021.Check date values in: date= (help)
14. ^Weller, Chris (18 February 2017). 'eHarmony is gearing up for a battle to win back millennials from Tinder and Bumble'. Business Insider. Retrieved 5 January 2018.
15. ^Crook, Jordan (15 December 2016). 'eHarmony makes its questionnaire optional to get hip with the times'. TechCrunch. Retrieved 3 January 2018.
16. ^Marinova, Polina (14 February 2017). 'How Dating Site eHarmony Uses Machine Learning to Help You Find Love'. Retrieved 3 January 2018.
17. ^Georgina Prodhan (2008-10-07). 'Brits value sex and in-laws, Web dating company finds'. Reuters. Retrieved 2010-05-04.
18. ^Jessica Shambora (September 23, 2010). 'eHarmony's algorithm of love'. Fortune. Retrieved February 5, 2011.
19. ^Canning, Andrea (2008-02-13). 'A Look Inside the eHarmony Love Lab'. ABC News. Retrieved 2013-11-01.
20. ^'eHarmony's New CEO Grant Langston Shares His New Vision'. OnlinePersonalsWatch.com. 2016-12-23. Retrieved 2016-12-26.
21. ^Miller, Lisa (26 April 2008). 'Belief Watch: eHarmony's Algorithm for Mr. Right'. Newsweek. Newsweek. Retrieved 8 January 2018.
22. ^Farhi, Paul (2007-05-13). 'They Met Online, but Definitely Didn't Click'. The Washington Post. pp. D01. Retrieved 2007-05-13.
23. ^ ^abcKornblum, Janet. 'eHarmony: Heart and soul', USA Today, May 18, 2005
24. ^'Interview with Neil Clark Warren'. Focus on the Family. Archived from the original on 2004-02-25. Retrieved 2004-03-03.
25. ^Egelko, Bob (2007-06-01). 'EHarmony sued for excluding same-sex matches'. The San Francisco Chronicle.
26. ^Miller, Joshua Rhett. '[https://www.anastesiadatescam.online/business/eharmony-com/ eHarmony to Provide Gay Dating Service after Lawsuit'], Fox News, November 20, 2008
27. ^'How to surf the Web for a mate: eHarmony founder'. CNBC. Retrieved 2015-09-17.
28. ^'Gay Dating for Relationship-Minded Gay & Lesbian Singles'. Compatible Partners. Retrieved 2010-04-03.
29. ^'eHarmony agrees to provide same-sex matches'. NBC News. 2008-11-20. Retrieved 2013-11-01.
30. ^Rachel Gordon (January 27, 2010). 'EHarmony settles lawsuit over gay matchmaking'. San Francisco Chronicle. Retrieved September 3, 2010.
31. ^'eHarmony Settles Gay Discrimination Suit'. CBS News. Associated Press. January 27, 2010. Retrieved September 3, 2010.
32. ^ ^abGarcia, Michelle (2010-03-31). 'The Online Dating Game'. Advocate.com. Retrieved 2013-11-01.
33. ^eHarmony? More like tone deaf 08.11.04 Joel Keller blacktable.com
34. ^Mills, Elinor (6 June 2012). 'eHarmony member passwords compromised'. CNET. Retrieved 11 July 2013.
35. ^CBS News: eHarmony suffers password breach on heels of LinkedIn
36. ^'Update on Compromised Passwords'. eHarmony blog. 6 June 2012. Retrieved 11 July 2013.
37. ^Halaburda, Hanna (15 October 2010). 'Fewer Customers, but the Right Ones'. Harvard Business Review. Harvard Business Review. Retrieved 8 January 2018.
38. ^Gelles, Jeff (17 August 2014). 'Dating site dinged for exaggerating claims of success'. The Philadelphia Inquirer. Retrieved 3 January 2018.
39. ^Wakefield, Jane (3 January 2018). 'Dating website eHarmony's 'scientific' match ad banned'. BBC News. Retrieved 4 January 2018.
40. ^Siddique, Haroon. (January 3, 2018). 'Watchdog bans advert's claim eHarmony is 'scientifically proven', The Guardian, Guardian Media Group, London, UK. Retrieved 8 February 2019.

External links[edit]